The Future I Will Feed
Pregnancy as alchemy, responsibility, and love in a changing world
I’m just tip-toeing into the deep lagoon, the great watery cosmic abyss with no end that is the moral responsibility to life itself—to be a wise and loving mother. And because of that, I am still shocked when old dogma and belief systems within me come up that say being a mother isn’t enough. I never felt that way when viewing other mothers and becoming a mom has always been my greatest prayer! They say life is a spiral…and so is soul excavation work.
It was a bit disorienting for me that I still seemed to subconsciously hold this belief that I was handicapped now, trapped, with no freedom, even after all these years of decolonizing my mind and calling in a child in a very conscious co-creating way with my partner. I could feel this somatic old memory of what has been told to women come up like a cell expressing, a sun bursting, exploding to clear itself of it’s own memory. These disempowering stories we’ve been told muddy our waters, and we must move them through wetlands, forests, and soils, natures natural water filtration system, to make them viable again. It was a reminder to become more aware of ones own body within this network we are all plugged into. To know the boundaries, the flexible lines of our own being.
If you choose to be completely aware and conscious and utilize pregnancy as a portal to waking up to yourself, it will be a wild and most rewarding journey. More than any psychedelic experience you can think of. Trust me—I’ve had some pretty big ones, haha.
I cannot even fathom what birth and postpartum are going to offer me if this is what pregnancy has already asked of me. The giving and receiving of the Mother Hoop has begun. I am only six months in, and I have crumbled and softened and stood up for my boundaries in ways I never have before.
I have been, and continue to be, in the process of alchemizing my own inner demons and showing up in ways that are more real, loving, and understanding of the complexity of the human experience. Already, it’s made me a better human being. And I’m so proud of myself for this.
If mothers held council for the world, we would be living in a very different reality..
And so this journey—pregnancy—has already been a revolutionary act. A quiet one perhaps, but one that stands for complete sovereignty, interwoven with the feminine principles that rule us all here on this Mother Earth planet.
The time we are in now is unique. This time with Earth right now is turning our focus toward the body, sovereignty, Earth with a voice, the kin-centric world view, humaneness, and the beating heart that feels and knows no division. We are being asked to take action from our deepest desire and care for life itself. This will be not a sedentary year. Buckle up…
New age spiritualism is out. Being a kind human being is in.
For that, I am so grateful to be pregnant and soon to be mothering a child who has also chosen to come here during this great transition, times that have been prophesied. We get to choose how we relate to life’s demands. Never forget that. Life wants us to become better versions of ourselves. It is a survival tactic to continue to evolve which includes decomposing from what is no longer needed. If we can remember this, we can all become alchemists—and that is the future I will feed. For the worlds kin.
Love, M
